What is life if there is not laughter?
Welcome to the lighter side of flyfishing! We welcome your humorous
September 27th, 1999
Yuffies, Hippies, Geezers and Worm Drowners
Fear of Fly Fishing
We thank Jack Ohman for use permission.
NAME: Elliott Abrams Richardson IV
OCCUPATION: Bond Trader
RESIDENCE: Upper East Seventies brownstone, Manhattan
Elliott make $730,000 a year trading pieces of paper with French bond
traders. It's a stressful life; Elliott used to unwind by taking martinis
through an IV bag and inflaming his nasal passages with cocaine, but
he decided that he needed a hobby to help him relax. Elliott chose
fly fishing because it's a little - not much - cheaper than his recreational
Elliott doesn't have a good selection of fly water to indulge his
habit, so he usualy charters a plane up to Maine or New Hampshire
instead of roll casting for condoms - "Chicago Trout" or "Coney
Island Whitefish" - in the East River.
This year, Elliot will spend $32,256.50 on fly fishing equipment.
He lives within limousine distance of the Orvis store, and like to
go there on Saturdays with his American Express Platinum/Plutonium
card (credit limit: GNP of Australia). To keep a little stress in his
hobby, Elliott likes to attempt to tie intricate Scottish salmon flies;
this way he can sniff head cement and get a little buzz if his tying
technique is a bit off. Elliott caught two browns (aggregate length:
13 inches) and seven brookies (total weight: one lb., two oz.) last
year in the Kill rivers. Elliott doesn't like to actually touch fish -
"Blows my manicure all to hell" - and thinks he might make a down
payment on New Zealand next year so he doesn't have to share any
riffles with riffraff. ~ Jack Ohman
If you like Jack's fly fishing humor, be sure to look for his new book,
GET THE NET! published by Willow Creek.
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