Lighter Side

What is life if there is not laughter? Welcome to the lighter side of flyfishing! We welcome your stories here!
July 30th, 2007

Sent in by Robert Cody

A lawyer went fishing in rural Montana on a small mountain stream flowing through a lovely valley. He hooked a huge rainbow on a home-tied fly and it took him downstream several yards and under a fence that crossed the stream, on which hung a no trespassing sign. The fish then repeatedly jumped, and eventually landed on the bank, as the lawyer tried unsuccessfully to urge it back up to where he could retrieve it.

At that moment, up rides the landowner on his tractor and finds the lawyer coming through the fence. He asks what is going on and the lawyer says, "I hooked a huge fish and it beached itself and I am just going to retrieve it."

The farmer replied, "This is my property and you are not coming over here."

The indignant lawyer said, "I am one of the best lawyers in the whole United States and if you don't let me get that fish, I will sue you and take everything you own."

The old farmer smiled and said, "Apparently you don't know how we settle disputes in the state of Montana." "We settle small disagreements with the 'Three Kick Rule.'"

The lawyer asked, "What is the three kick rule?"

The farmer replied, "Well because the fish is on my property, I get to go first and I get to kick you three times and then you get to kick me three times and so on back and forth until one of us gives up."

The attorney quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided he could easily take the old codger. He agreed to abide by the local custom.

The old farmer got down off of his tractor and walked over to the attorney. His first kick was planted squarely in the lawyers groin and dropped the lawyer to his knees.

His second kick to the lawyer's midriff sent the lawyer's breakfast gushing to the ground.

The lawyer was on all fours on the ground and the farmer's third kick knocked the lawyer face first into a large fresh cow pie.

Summoning every last bit of willpower, the lawyer got to his feet and wiping his face with his sleeve said, "OK you old fart. Now its my turn!"

The old farmer smiled and said, "Nah, I give up. You can have the fish."


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