Lighter Side

What is life if there is not laughter? Welcome to the lighter side of flyfishing! We welcome your stories here!
November 22nd, 2004

Zen Thoughts
Sent in by David Griego

    1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just leave me the hell alone.

    2. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a leaky tire. 3. It's always darkest before dawn. So if your're going to steal your neighbors newspaper, that's the time to do it.

    4. Sex is like air. It's not important unless you aren't getting any.

    5. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.

    6. No one is listening until you pass gas.

    7. Always remember you're unique. Just like everyone else.

    8.Never test the depth of the water with both feet.

    9. If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

    10. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.

    11. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

    12. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

    13. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.

    14. If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

    15. Some days you are the bug; some days you are the windshield.

    16. Don't worry; it only seems kinky the first time.

    17. Good judgement comes from bad experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgement.

    18. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.

    19. A closed mouth gathers no foot.

    20. Duct tape is like the Force. It has a light side and a dark side, and it holds the universe together.

    21. There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.

    22. Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your lips are moving.

    23. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

    24. Never miss a good chance to shut up.

    25. We are born naked, wet, and hungry, and get slapped on our ass...then things get worse.

    26. Some people are like Slinkies...not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs.

    27. Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.

    28. All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

    29. There are two kinds of pedestrians: the quick and the dead.

    30. If quitters never win, and winners never quit, then who is the fool who said, "Quit while you're ahead?"

    Lighter Side Archive


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