A blond man is in the bathroom and his wife shouts "Did you find the shampoo?" He answers "Yes but I'm not sure what to do...it's for dry hair and I just wet mine."

A blond man spots a letter on his doormat. It says on the envelope "DO NOT BEND". He spends the next 2 hours trying to figure out how to pick it up.

A blond man shouts frantically into the phone "My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only 2 minutes apart!" "Is this her first child?" asks the doctor. "No!" he shouts, "this is her husband!"

A blond man is in jail, the guard looks in his cell and sees him hanging by his feet. "Just WHAT are you doing?" he asks. "Hanging myself" the blond replies. "The rope should be around your neck" says the guard. "I tried that," he replies, "but then I couldn't breath."

An Italian tourist asks a blond man "Why do scuba divers always fall backwards off their boats?" To which the blond man replies, "If they fell forward they'd still be in the boat."

A friend told the blond man, "Christmas is on a Friday this year." The blond man then said, "Let's hope it's not on the 13th."

Two blond men found 3 grenades and they decided to take them to the police station. One of them asks, "What if one explodes before we get there?" The other says, "We'll lie and say we only found 2."